Psykogeddon by Dave Stone

Author:Dave Stone [Stone, Dave]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi
Tags: Science Fiction
Publisher: Rebellion Publishing Limited
Published: 2009-11-04T13:00:00+00:00

"I'm Danni Consart, this is Mega-City News - plugging fact into your news-hole like we were pretending it was a penis made out of news and we were doing sex!

"Coming up on channel 17,412, Big Dan Ratersnap and his Cavalcade of Country Pickin' Glee, sponsored by Whimslowe Shirts, the only shirt to wear if you feel the sudden need for a shirt. But first, hot news that could change the very face of the Big Meg forever!

"It seems that the Lady Slocombe of Shangri La Towers hab-block has lost her cat - that's her animal companion of the feline persuasion, apparently, and not any kind of euphemism at all. Not exactly all that hot in the ole news stakes, you might be thinking, but you'd be thinking wrong.

"Seems like the old biddy is so desperate to get her small domesticated animal back that she's offered a reward of half her fortune - that's the order of seven hundred million creds - no questions asked. This has prompted a large number of citizens to turn up with anything from a stuffed child's toy to an Undercity para-rat scavenger spray painted tortoise-shell brown over its more usual fluorescent green.

"The area immediately around Shangri La Towers, Sector Nine, has now been declared an official No-go Zone until the riots are brought under control and the bodies, together with various inextricably-lodged feline forms, are hauled away.

"In other news, new developments in the trial of Drago San mean that it looks like dragging on for hours yet. Live feeds are available if you want, but for the moment, we here at Mega-City News will be providing up-to-the-minute animated artists' impressions of what might ultimately happen to the prisoner if a gang of Janie-crazed Lesbian shok-punk chicks were to storm the Hall of Justice and start opening fire with a Screaming Meatgun.

"Big Dan Rattersnap, coming next, after these important messages."

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